I can’t fight these feelings any longer and there’s something I need you all to know

This is a preview of tomorrow’s edition of my sports show, Sports; “Any Way You Want It!” as part of Bearcast Media. I mentioned on Twitter Monday that I would be letting out all my frustration with the Bengals, and I told those who plan on tuning in to be ready. But for those who may not be able to tune in right at the opening kickoff at 2 p.m. tomorrow, I wanted you all to know everything I’m going to be hitting on during tomorrow’s show. And as you read in the headline, there is something I need you all to know that I mention towards the end of this post.

You would think that after a loss like Sunday to the Browns that Marvin Lewis would be fired. But when your team is owned by a man who only cares about his team being relevant instead of prioritizing winning, that’s just not going to happen. Mike Brown doesn’t care what all of us as Bengals fans want, particularly a Super Bowl championship. This, of course, is my opinion, but I think he’s lazy, cheap and somehow willing to keep a head coach who is 0-7 in the playoffs. 0-7!! What is it going to take for Mike Brown to fire Marvin Lewis once and for all?! Great organization success starts at the top. The most successful franchises have or had great owners including Robert Kraft of the Patriots, Art Rooney of the Steelers and formerly Eddie DeBartolo Jr. of the 49ers. They also had or still have great coaches: Bill Belichick (Patriots), Chuck Noll (Steelers) and Bill Walsh (49ers). The Bengals simply don’t have that in Mike Brown and Marvin Lewis. How much more futility are they going to put us through? We, as fans, deserve a whole lot better.

As for Sunday’s game; it was just flat out awful and embarrassing. I’ve said that this year could be truly different. Yeah, all this year is doing showing everything lackadaisical about our organization. I realized Sunday that going to games is like time-traveling back into the 1990’s, a time when the Bengals were flat out awful. There’s nothing to be excited about with this team because it is the same old song and dance every year, only this time the Browns just simply outclassed the Bengals on their home turf.

Another thing I noticed on Sunday is that I feel like there is not a lot of history preserved throughout the stadium. There’s no ring of honor, no banners even commemorating the two AFC Championships or other division titles, no anything that, amid the ugliness of Sunday’s game, can still make one proud to be a Bengals fan. A good life lesson is to live in the present. Well, the present with this team certainly isn’t very good. And there’s no proud history to look back on in the stadium to take your mind off the product that is out on the field.

Here’s some historical facts about the Bengals: their franchise playoff record is 5-14. Just five playoff wins, the same number of Super Bowl rings that Tom Brady has by himself and one less than the Pittsburgh Steelers, who have an NFL-record six. It’s like we’re stuck in such a bad period of time with this franchise and there doesn’t appear to be a way out of the darkness anytime soon, especially after an embarrassing home loss to the Browns.

The Bengals are also so far behind everybody else, I feel like, in the NFL. Teams have gotten new stadiums, or palaces they are just so nice, some have won their first Super Bowl, some have hired forward-thinking and innovative coaches to make their offenses lethal and defenses tenacious and some are able to be successful just because of who they are as an organization. Hmm hmm, New England and Pittsburgh. And yet, here are the Bengals seemingly having not escaped the dark period of the 1990’s. Now I see why so many Bengals fans in Cincinnati are frustrated, and, you know what, I feel the same way. I HAVE HAD ENOUGH!

Do you all know how much energy I put into at least 16 weeks starting in September going through the end of the regular-season and possibly more in the playoffs?! I love getting up on game-day knowing that I get to watch the team I grew up rooting for and now having season tickets brings more energy on Sunday’s, especially for home games. It’s literally like I put my life on hold for three hours when the Bengals are playing. I am so locked into the games it’s ridiculous. Whether it’s going bonkers when they score, yelling at the officials when they miss a penalty, smacking my Bengals towel on my seat at the game or furniture at my house- I haven’t broken anything yet-, throwing my hat on the ground in frustration or even punching a wall, everything else going on in my life seems to cease when the Bengals are playing. But after Sunday, I seriously questioned my loyalty to them.

As I said after Sunday’s game, I had never been more depressed after a loss. I was worn out as a fan, done with this season. And this was before Andy Dalton was put on injured reserve. So much so that when a friend of mine texted me she was going to the Big Ten Championship on Saturday I’m like, yeah, maybe I should look at tickets myself. After all, I had just written a positive post about Urban Meyer and the Buckeyes. Get out of Cincinnati, go watch some high-quality football; sounds like a great weekend. Heck, I wanted to go to Vegas this weekend to go to the Bearcats game at UNLV, and I’m not even 21 telling you all that. I wanted to get out of Cincinnati, get away from the Bengals, because part of me doesn’t want to be at the game on Sunday against Denver. This is the lowest of lows for a franchise with already such a lousy history. But then the bigger part of me, my loyalty, kicked in and made me realize I need to be at the Bengals game Sunday, and here’s why.

My family has had Bengals season tickets since their inaugural season in 1968. That right there is commitment, dedication and loyalty. My grandparents were at the Freeze Bowl to see them win their first AFC Championship. That’s dedication epitomized. The tickets were eventually passed down to my two uncles, and they are two of the most loyal Bengals fans not just in Cincinnati, but anywhere in the United States of America. Every year, we are hopeful that maybe this is the year.

Some of you already know about this but for those who don’t, one of my uncles, sadly, passed away three months ago today after a three-year battle with brain cancer. Devastating. He and I had, and still do, an unbreakable bond. I am #SquidStrong because of him- his nickname was “Squid”. A man who enthusiastically fulfilled his roles as a father, husband, principal and Bengals fan and had so much life in him; that’s who my uncle was.

He was as loyal and optimistic as any Bengals fan there is, always showing up and showing out at Bengals games. So as I was thinking about not going to the game on Sunday and punting on the season, I thought about what my uncle would want me to do. He’s watching me, and I know he would want me to stay loyal to this team even during the lowest of lows.

So I will be at the game on Sunday. I need to be there because WHEN the Bengals win the Super Bowl, I’m going to remember how I was at this game on Sunday and stood by them the rest of this season, and it’s going to make the championship feel that much sweeter. And on a positive, the Bengals are still only a game back of the wild card and A.J. Green says he will be playing on Sunday. As for Jeff Driskel, if he wins the last five regular-season games plus a playoff game; you can bet your bottom dollar I will be naming my first-born son after him.